Release

A small flame against the burning fire.
A spark of darkness amongst the black night.
Seek me. See.

The silent blow of the wind in a storm.
The unheard cry of a child amidst cheerful laughter.
Hear me. Listen.

The more it tries, the faster the light dies.
The more it shouts, the quicker the sound fades.
See the spark. Hear the whisper.

The smallest corner of a puzzle cannot be missed.
The tiniest indentation of a tooth is noticed.
It is already seen. Its existence is already known.
For He has already seen.
For He has always cherished,
like the most precious gem ever created.

The echo from the fall of a tree in the wilderness still resonates.
The scream from the bird in the empty desert still cries.
It had always been heard. It had always held a voice.
For He has already heard.
For He has already listened to its cries
since its beginning and before its birth.

Glow with the fire that has been buried and hidden inside.
Shine with the light that has already been given to you.
The star will still radiate just as brightly as all the others.
Eyes will see.
They will realize.

No need to try, to yearn, to cower.

Sing to your fullest. Release that faithful melody from long ago.
Be the harmony.
Be empowered by the Voice. Move and speak with your will.
You have a voice.
Ears will hear.
They will recognize.

Do not strain. Do not be silenced. Do not fear.

It is and it will always be beautiful.

To know. To trust. To believe.

Existence, worth, and strength – Never forget,
never fade away, for there is understanding,
there is value, there is Love.

“Take heart. I am.”

~ March 22, 2010

Standing in the Center

So cold. So frozen.
Where am I?

So far. So distant.
What is this that I see?

So continuous. So still.
How can this be?

The one punished for looking back,
The one reprimanded for thinking forward,
The one imprisoned for being in the present.

When has it become this way?
Why? How? Where?
What?

I cannot seem to remember. I cannot seem to recall.

Perhaps from the moment that light was declared, this was the way
that it had always been.

What’s the difference?

What’s the matter?

How is it that there can be no movement and no sound,
not even the slightest trickle of the night’s rain?

So calm? So quiet? So at peace?

Is that how it is now?
Is this what it is like?

A simple stone on the edge of the cliff with no sense of
fear, shame, sadness, or anything?

What is that? over there. look? will you please?

I turn back to the cliff to reach down and pick up the small round marble,
this tiny fragment of the Earth, and
I throw it far across the ocean.

What is this?

Carefree? Lightened? Free?

I turn away from the scene and look at the empty space ahead of me.

Water in a jar.
Air in a balloon.

A reflection in the mirror.


The crystallization of nothing.

~ March 23, 2010

To Do List

To circle. To step. To tip toe.
To reach. To yearn. To envy.
To drop. To trip. To faint.
To sleep. To stop. To end.

Lose. Forfeit. Die.

To open. To let go. To cry.
To need. To rely. To trust.
To forget. To not think. To release.
To savor. To dare. To save.

Gain. Believe. Live.

~ March 23, 2010

Talking to My Therapist

Thank you for everything that you’ve done.
Thank you. I love you.
Really. Yes. Why not?
No. No, I can’t.

I don’t need you.
Can you love a monster? No. You can’t.
You care. Sure. You sympathize. Yes. You pity. Right.

Why is it that every time I’m here,
I’m reminded of how cold-blooded of an animal I really am?

I don’t even see why I come to these places.

Oh? Really now?
What do you think of me then?

You’re right. It doesn’t matter.
I don’t need you. You don’t matter.

Why should you matter?

I have him.

He is all I’ll ever need.
His approval is the only one that I seek. He keeps me sane.
He is the only one who knows where my box really is though.
He is the only one who has the key to the lock, didn’t you know?
He is the only one I would ever consider to be worthy.

I guess we don’t really matter to each other then, me and you.

What are you still doing here?
I’m right aren’t I?

I know I am.

What are you doing here again?
I’m doing just fine.
Why do you call?
I told you, I’m doing great.
I’m fine. You can go.

Bye now.

Why am I still talking to you?

~ March 24, 2010